Monday 5 September 2011

Platform-Building Campaign - Flash Fiction.


If you're here looking for Lady Gwen's Judge & Jury Blogest, it's directly below this Challenge.

Here we go with the first challenge set by Rachael Harrie

Mine's a contemporary piece!



The door swung open, as though beckoning her to greet the morn. Raw scent of man replaced by salty air drifted through her cliff-top cottage. He was gone, but he’d be back. They always came back if she wanted them to. 
   How strange, though, that the sound of the sea crashing on the cliffs seemed closer than usual, almost surreal, as though swirling beneath her. True enough, pilot officer Brett Master’s had made the ground move all right, and maybe this time she might hang around longer than just for the weekend. 
   She smiled, the local lovesick barmaid leapt to mind, whom, according to village gossip a bit of a witch on the side. Funny really, the silly girl had cast an evil eye in their direction and mouthed some whispered curse as they’d made to leave. They’d naturally laughed and left the pub arms about each other.
   She stretched cat-like, languidly slid from the bed and walked naked toward the door.
   The lawn, the road . . . What?
   The ground had moved: moved for real.
   Shiiiiiit.
   She stood there, nothing beneath but swirling water, and Brett gone for good, no doubt about it.
   The cottage was teetering on the edge of the cliff, and suddenly the door swung shut behind her.  
   

To see entries by other participants go here.

39 comments:

Christine Rains said...

That was great! Nice ending. I love the image you created.

Alleged Author said...

Oh no! The ending is quite gripping and leaves me wanting more. Great job!

Beth Stilborn said...

Oh wow. Edge-of-the-seat stuff at the end! Well done!

Unknown said...

brilliant! hi fro afellow campaigner...number 62 in the list x

Nadja Notariani said...

This was quite interesting. Totally different perspective on the same prompt. I liked her musings before she realized what had actually happened...Nicely worded. ~ Nadja

MorningAJ said...

That's an excellent take on the subject!

Summer Ross said...

I really enjoyed the read Francine. As usually you kept tension towards the end and really made me want to know what happens next!

Anonymous said...

Delicious, delicious.... I want more....lol

D..J. Kirkby said...

Brill! What happens next?

Francine Howarth said...

Hi ladies,

Thanks for stopping by, I'm having a job keeping up with everyone! ;)

If I haven't stopped by your blog, yet, I will in the next day or so. Promise!

best
F

Anonymous said...

Uh Oh! that's not good, is it? Nice job. I'm #72

Anonymous said...

Love this! You ramped up the tension wonderfully and now I'm dying for more :)

Denise Covey said...

Hi Francine. Great read from start to finish. She got her comeuppance eh? D

Anonymous said...

Cliffhanger for sure, both figuratively *and* literally;)

Angela Cothran said...

Oh, NICE job!!! Don't mess with witchy barmaids :)

julie fedderson said...

I never expect your endings! Beware the evil eye.

1000th.monkey said...

Never laugh at the local witch... though, if there's a witch, can it still be considered contemporary?

Anonymous said...

Goodness is the house about to slip down the cliff?
I love this line: 'She stretched cat-like, languidly slid from the bed and walked naked toward the door'.

Gary Gauthier said...

Francine, that was a tantalizing piece. No, not the heroine, your submission. It left me intrigued to find out how it all turns out for her.

Unknown said...

This is awesome Francine. I loved it.

Grillyfish said...

Ooh I love it - I want to read more :)

Life said...

loved it...wish it dint end so soon...:)

Isis Rushdan said...

Nice! So unexpected. Need to know more.

Rosalind Adam said...

Hi Francine, this is a fascinating piece of flash fiction but it's over 200 words. I was the allotted judge for your work and I'm afraid I'm not allowed to consider any pieces that are over 200. Even cutting out the three dots (which each count as a word the way you've typed it) it's still 10 words over the 200. So sorry about this but thought you'd like to know for future reference.

Francine Howarth said...

Hi Guys and Gals,

Thanks for stopping by to comment. If I haven't reached you yet, I'll be along shortly!

Hi Rosalind, yes, I know, over word count. Truth is, I'm in the campaign for the fun not the winning as such! ;)

best
F

kjmckendry said...

Nice piece. I enjoyed reading it. I'm a fellow campaigner.

Unknown said...

Dear Francine,

Wow! What a story! Talk about a real 'Heart-Stopper'! You have taken the term 'cliff-hanger' to a new dimension! And every word is weighed with care!
Impressive!

Thank you for your advice about my H-S-text. You are, of course, right. It's time to get my protagonists together.

Best wishes,
Anna

For the benefit of other readers:

Anna's RFW No. 17 'Heart-Stoppers'

Jocelyn Rish said...

I guess that barmaid was more than a bit of a witch if she moved the whole house! :-) And like Anna said, great use of the literal meaning of cliff-hanger.

Alica McKenna Johnson said...

Great ending

Heather Justesen said...

Leaves me wanting more, that's for sure. Very cool.

Kerrin said...

nicely done Francine. How is she going to get out of this one??!

Doreen McGettigan said...

What a cliff hanger...loved it!!

http://www.doreenmcgettigan.com

Denise Covey said...

Bummer about the word count Francine, but it was fun wasn't it?

D

Francine Howarth said...

Hi ladies, and thanks all for stopping by to comment.

Hi D: It's not about competing for a win, not for me. You know I can cut-it on word count if I want to. But, my participation is merely for the fun of it all.

best
F

Katie Dodge said...

Nice cliffhanger! Great job! :D

Unknown said...

This is wonderful! I'm finally getting around to follow everyone in my historical fiction group. I'll look forward to reading this blog.

Francine Howarth said...

Hi Katie and Angelina,

Thanks for stopping by. I'll be checking to make sure I've dropped in to your blogs ASAP.

best
F

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I dig that ending! Over the cliff she goes...

Francine Howarth said...

Hi Alex,

Looks like it, don't it? Done for! :o

best
F