I really had to put my brain into gear for this:
Through ages past we danced our life from seed to journey’s end.
WE shimmied in carpets green and gold and watched through rainbow arches. WE flounced in drifts of blue and white, oft spied beneath some wooded bough. Yet, no other it would seem as wild in dance and blaze of glory.
Why then that WE, are the chosen symbol of death, of grieving, and remembrance?
A rippling breeze, a howling gale, wind-ravaged, wet and ragged, and still we stand on spidered green. Yet, for all the whispering and singing of the grasses, and leaves all hollering from the trees, none of that can temper our vibrancy.
Why then that WE, are the chosen symbol of death, of grieving, and remembrance?
Adrift in canorous water-filled holes, fluttering through bared bones and twisted metal, we've see the lifeless souls depart, from the barbarous sins of wars and wants. Yet, still we remain, in annihilations waste, beacons all aflame.
So perhaps, most blessed then are WE, the immodest among our species, who represent death, grieving, and remembrance. For when our garish scarlet hue stands proud upon lapels, WE are the symbol of the fallen.
For battlefields and oceans deep, are a hellish place to die.
Francine Howarth
To read the other entries go here.
17 comments:
Oh goody, I'm first, since the clock has just struck midnight in the Old Country. It's just past 9 in the morning here. Seeing Tessa was adamant the entries should go on at midnight your time, I've been hovering for a day waiting to post, hee hee.
Anyways, loved this. My kind of writing. Some new words for me even - Adrift in canonous water-filled holes. Haven't heard of canonous before. Love the look and sound of it.
Have you read the poems: Break of Day in the Trenches by Isaac Rosenberg and Grass, by Carl Sandburg. If not, read them, and it would provide more emotion/imagery for your piece. They capture the link between nature and war so terrifyingly well.
Great idea, great descriptions, but there are signs of struggle where I felt you weren't sure of the best way to express what you wanted to say. As you will see when you read mine, I struggled and thought I couldn't do it,but the parameters were pretty wide. It's going to be interesting to read the entries.
Later, Francine..:)
Francine: This is by far my most favorite of your writing. I have no words to say just how good this was. Holy smokes. This entry made me feel sorry that I didn't enter this one. Wow.
Side note to L'Assie in case she comes back. I cannot load your site, I don't know what is wrong. I have been trying and trying to come visit you there, but as soon as your site loads, everything stall on my computer and I have to shut everything down. Any ideas?
Hi L'A,
Oh poo, it should have read canorous water-filled holes = field guns (boom boom boom)melodious terrifying sound! I'm not a poet and don't pretend to be one. Hubby's the poet, and I'll post up one of his next week if I can find it. People who've wread it have cried!
The idea itself came in a thrice and flowed easily in mind if not inwords, the time in getting it down on the laptop another thing entirely = hubby under my bloody feet in demanding mode! Plus I had my own blogfest to sort out, which is not the scene I had planned for at all.
Hi Wendy,
Thanks. Glad you liked it.
best
F
Pure poetry Francine.
You bring the inanimate alive and give it depth, and heart.
Beautifully done.
.......dhole
Had to keep reminding myself this was prose! It was so poetic Francine...with a bit of tweaking it will be a wicked poem! What a fantastic choice of abstractness: lovely poppies! Kept me guessing till the end!
Very lyrical. I'm not familiar with flower symbolism though. What kind of flowers are those?
I like the twist it took at the end. It went from the poppies questioning their lot in life to complete acceptance. Nice finish!
Beautiful, and yes, I agree with the others, it's very poetic! I find it fascinating that so many people said they found the theme really hard, but nonetheless I'm finding some of the most poetic and touching writing I've seen from a lot of people!
I also find it fascinating that the poppy, out of all flowers, is the one used to symbolize remembrance.
Also, thank you so much for joining in on my blogfest!
I love the flow of this - so quick and easy to read. Really beautiful and macabre.
This is beautiful. We don't have this tradition here in the States. I loved this line - "For when our garish scarlet hue stands proud upon lapels, WE are the symbol of the fallen." Wonderful post! :D
Beautiful to read. Really enjoyed this piece. Thank you for sharing!
Scribbler to Scribe
This is a nice take, I like that it's different than the humorous vibe I see in other entires.
Beautifully written, the words flow perfectly :) And great imagery of the poppies!
Beautifully written. This brought a tear to my eyes. It had a military feel to it (wars and wants/battlefields and oceans) and my son is going into the Army when he turns 18. If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to save that and copy it off to keep in a album.
Hi Jacee,
Absolutely, no problem! After all, it's all about war and battles and, of those who didn't return! Hell, I should have signed it.;)
best
F
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